Drinking Routine

I want to reflect on my routine towards the end of my drinking days, the last couple of months of my drinking got pretty bad, my weekly afternoon routine was dominated by drinking choices and my weekend was not mine to enjoy with my family it was my alcoholic binge time.

Friday was the day I lived for it's an alcoholics holiday! I would often pick some beers up during the day and take them back to the office with me, having my first drink around 3pm I'd finish 3-4 before leaving the office at around 5pm, I would then generally make a stop at the local pub, I'd have at least 2 pints at the pub which I would down in quick succession as I was rushing to get home so I didn't upset my partner too much (Who hated me going to the pub), I'd leave the pub & then head straight to the bottle shop where I would grab either a carton of beer or a bottle of something, Once home I would sneak it into my backyard using a shelf I had installed for that exact reason, I did this for two reasons, I was ashamed of the amount I was drinking and it would avoid an argument with my partner as she knew what the end result was going to be if she saw how much alcohol I was intending to drink. Once the booze was in my back yard it was basically an all you can drink, I would drink until I would black out and eventually pass out. Great Friday night hey?

Saturday I would generally wake up on the couch after not making it to bed, I would wake up feeling like absolute shit, (I suffered bad with hang overs) my head would be pounding, my gut would be tuning I'd be tired dizzy and hungry. To top this off I'd have my two kids who were 2-3 or younger at the time full of energy and wanting their dad to play with them, this was just not possible and I would be grouchy and abrupt with them, and just not want them to be around me! A big regret I have. Saturdays wouldn't get much better I'd generally be hung over the entire day and not wanting to do anything, complete waste of a day. If I started to come around later in the afternoon I would go and get some more alcohol and do it again, if not I would remain sober Saturday night and start again Sunday.

Sunday I hated, as I never wanted to drink but very rarely resisted. I would always drink during the day on Sunday and I would do this to help recover more by Monday, quite often I would have had my first drink well before 12pm on Sunday and by 2 - 3pm be well and truly drunk. I would never completely right myself off on a Sunday the way I would on a Friday or Saturday night but I'd still be plenty drunk to most people's standards, I'd hit the water around 7 - 8pm and try and sober up the best I could so I could get to work the next day and at least be somewhat functional useful!

Weekdays I would start the Monday feeling average due to drinking Sunday, I would try to remain sober on a Monday and most weeks I would manage to do this, by Tuesday though I was feeling back to almost 100% at least what I thought was 100% so I was ready to hit it again, again i would try to drink as early as I could so I would stop on the way home from work and pick up at least a 6 pack, I would then down these beers as fast as possible to try and get the biggest effect I could from them. If I had only got a 6pack it was never enough, I would always end up going back down the bottle shop to get more. I would always stop drinking by about 9pm and hit the water to try and sober up as much as possible ready for work the next day. The rest of the week would
follow a very similar script, walking that fine line between almost being not functional at work and just managing to get there and get the job done. My work was affected by this, but this is another story for another day.

My drinking problem wasn't so much a drink every day type problem I could occasionally go 3 - 4 days without a drink, my problem was when I drank I did not have a ceiling, I did not stop until I could not physically for whatever reason get any more alcohol into my body. The only think that stopped me from drinking more was the hangovers and having to allow myself to recover before I drank myself to oblivion again.

Success built from failure,
The Alcoholic Entrepreneur

www.thealcoholicentrepreneur.com

Money

Oh the money how could I not write about the money, as you guys are aware I am now well over 3 months sober and one of the many things that have changed for the better since stopping drinking is the disposable income that has been freed up. I have always been a pretty frugal guy and prided myself on money management, however after I had put away for all the necessities, 90% of what was left went onto alcohol, so basically my "fun money" was all spent on alcohol. This was something that always bothered me and I think something that ultimately really helped towards making the decision to stop drinking.

Alcohol is expensive at the best of times, but when you are drinking excessively and you know it, you try to trick your mind into not drinking as much, so one of my ways to try and combat this was to buy smaller amounts of alcohol at time for eg. Instead of buying the $40 carton with its 24 beers, i would by the 6 pack for $16, but once I'd finished the 6 pack and wasn't satisfied I'd then go and buy another 6 pack so I'd end up spending $32 on 12 beers, when had I have bought the carton I would have only paid $20, this was happening all the time and really did frustrate me!

But now my fun money is mine again and it feels great! but what feels even more great is i am not planning on just increasing my lifestyle with this money, I am planning on keeping a record of the money I am saving and holding myself accountable with the help of you guys by posting a record as I go on this blog.

This money is then going to be used to fund small projects to bring some legitimacy to the Entrepreneurial part for the name I have given myself, As I have already got my stripes for the Alcoholic part =P


Success built from failure,
The Alcoholic Entrepreneur

www.thealcoholicentrepreneur.com

Lifestyle Reboot

It's been over 3 months since I last had an alcoholic drink and my body is definitely thanking me, I used to live in a clouded state of hungover ness, and never felt 100%.

That cloud has lifted and my mind is feeling stronger than it has in years and as a result has started focusing on things I neglected for years, my health and fitness being a stand out at the moment.

This change is great, although I am being caution and strategic with each move I make at the moment, I do not want to over do it, I don't want to put all this energy into not drinking and all this energy into eating healthy and working out and then crash and burn and fall right back into my drinking non-productive lifestyle.

So to avoid this i am looking at the whole thing as a marathon and not a race, I am learning and making small changes with my choices of food, I am adding exercise to my life in small ways which may be as simple as parking my car further away and walking for 5 minutes, I want the changes I make to be permanent, as permanent as the non-drinking so they need to be done slowly educationally and strategically.

This life change I have chosen is not just about the drinking, it is about what the drinking was holding me back from, the possibilities that have now become available, I want to share my story, my story and journey to help others overcome addiction or doubt, because anything is possible with hard work and dedication.


Success built from failure,
The Alcoholic Entrepreneur

www.thealcoholicentrepreneur.com

Higher Power

Within Alcohol Anonymous there is a lot of talk about 'god' or your 'higher power', the first couple of times i attended AA I was a bit wary of this, as I am not a religious person, so felt a little put off thinking the whole program could be religious based. This thought was soon squashed and the real meaning of the word 'god' has been made obvious and it has nothing to do with the religion, at least to the people who don't want it to.

I have heard many talks from people explaining how they are not religious yet their 'higher power' or 'god' has helped get them through and keep strong away from alcohol, i used to balk at these talks and felt they were contradicting themselves, but over time i have come to understand what they really meant and with that it has given me a whole new understanding of the word 'god'.

So i started to give my higher power a bit of though, something to help hold me accountable something to turn to when things start getting tough and the idea of drinking starts to creep back into my mind.

My goals and ambitions have always been rather high, some would say too high, but I have always been comfortable with them and felt anything is possible in this life if you put your mind to it and work hard enough to get it! However these goals and ambitions were always just a thought & dream while I was drinking I had the ideas and had the want but picking up that first beer or stepping in the pub was always the easier option.

Since being sober that has changed, I have started several small projects this blog being one of them and I continue to follow through with them, I am revelling the new found energy and ambition and feel as if this is what was missing from my life.

This is why I feel my higher power is the ambition and want to succeed that I have!


Success built from failure,
The Alcoholic Entrepreneur

www.thealcoholicentrepreneur.com